Over the past few weeks I have quietly been preparing myself for the start of a long overdue, spoken about part of my life. I've had meetings about it, done research, constantly blogged about it and have had it as part of my life purpose for almost as long as I have been sharing my #ProjectMe story, if not longer.
That old cliche is true and it wouldn't have been the right time before. I had to go through a major epiphany about a key part of living one's #ProjectMe journey and that only happened after something else that was long overdue ... a mini meltdown.
It took a few days between thinking I wasn't worthy of helping anyone gain insight into how to live life more consciously and finding the golden nuggets of lessons that I have learned for myself and am now very ready to share with the world. I'm grateful for the perfect timing of the December holidays to get myself ready both emotionally and physically. With work a whole lot quieter, I started by spring cleaning everything around me. I did the equivalent of moving house and made space for so much new and fresh. I then got myself into the routine of going to sleep a little earlier and exercising at least 3 times a week.
I doubled my "me" time in the morning (more about that in the book) and spent half of it being quiet and the other half reflecting back on my life and mainly my decade of living #ProjectMe. I kept a book next to me and with each vital point or important story that will reiterate my journey, I made notes.
Before long, I was pretty sure that all the content I needed was ready to be turned into something workable.
But then, the chaos began ...
"It's a book, Jodene, not a textbook!"
The more I thought about how I was going to write or what I was going to say, the more stressed out I got. I'm a natural born teacher and my writing comes second to that, so if you go back to the start of my blogging days, you'll see that I started off with a rocky road of having to teach a little less and share my story, filled with teaching, a whole lot more.
I'm getting it so right in the blogging space, but every time I thought about any kind of context of the book, the tone was totally different. It got to structured and formal in my head. I kept on wanting to put headings everywhere and have lessons and exercise as the main focus.
I had to go back to being silent and stop the thousands of butterflies for making too much noise in my head and my heart. I couldn't hear of feel myself and I wanted to go right back to making myself too busy to embark on writing this book.
I don't believe that 2015 is going to be a year of getting away with hiding in the shadows and avoiding the next steps to reaching our fullest potential, so I pushed through. I spent the last few days with myself, as much as possible, and let myself think about why everyone reads my blog and what's made it a success. I reconnected with the nurturing storyteller that is somewhere within me and and then I tapped back into my teacher.
I started thinking in my life stories and by Saturday afternoon, I had re-framed my thoughts. ?I said "no" to seeing my most precious friends today and I woke up with one final task ... to plot the final content of the book. It doesn't have to be in perfect order (because life doesn't work in the order of our expectations, which is also a teaser for the book). So, I spent a few hours lying in bed and running through all the content I had jotted down before heading out into the sun and plonking myself under an umbrella for half the afternoon. The sun was scorching, but I was perfectly shaded and then I let myself run through my book.
I must admit, I did end up daydreaming about manifesting a hot, tattooed geek (which is another whole blog post ... not book entry. Well, at least not this book) but I pulled my head back to #ProjectMe until I finally had my last calming realisation.
I plan to write at least 35 000 words. There will be chapters and headings and exercises to do, but that will all fall into place. All I have to do is write my book as if it were the longest blog post of my life.
This is why you're reading it now ... this tones and style is why everyone reads it. The energy with which I write here is what makes me love writing, so why change a formula that works ... right?
I've also had to remind myself that a blog post takes me about half an hour to write and that I don't let myself get distracted and I just need to do the same for the book.
I've decided to give myself between 1 and a half and 2 hours in the mornings before the rest of the world wakes up and my day begins, because I know what my days are like. Another lesson I've learned along the way is to work with what you've got ... and I have a crazy, busy life, which I happen to love.
So, tomorrow it begins ... maybe not at Chapter 1!