I'm so proud of me. My excitement that I went to gym, walked ten laps around the track and feel fabulous this morning is awesome. I'm thrilled that I can feel the difference between muscle pain and damaged disk pain. Of course I want to share it with everyone who has encouraged me, but there's something I'm noticing. Despite everyone else's pride and?excitement, I'm getting a lot of 'don't overdo it' lectures.
Me? Overdo it? Well I tried that with the Greggie and he double checked about 5 times to make sure that I'm sure that I have the overdo it personality. The Jock was a little better and kinda believed me after just one attempt at lecturing me. My little sis is obviously worried that I'm to hurt myself before my wedding and mother ... well mothers just worry.
It was our usual Tuesday night get together and after realising that we have all done so well with sorting out some of the addict archetype, that it was time to move onto something else. We started by focusing on why we make the choices we do. Even down to the little choices of what time we wake up and why we have the routines we do. Well that didn't go to well because our fearful issues kept us from getting anywhere. That's it ... deal with fear first.
Archetypically, fear and faith are?governed?by the prostitute archetype and it what it says it is: you sell your soul for fear of survival. I've been teaching archetypes for many years and Greggie and myself have a great passion for this work. We live it every day and one of the things that I hear us saying to every student and to ourselves all the time is, "you can't have fear and faith at the same time." It's not possible to feel faith when you are afraid and fear would not have it's place when faith is around." I also believe that all you have to do is pick one. Yep ... all you have to do!
Well before we could focus on the fear we had to pick something else first. Just one thing that we choose to do that might not be in the highest esteem. There nights are profound and life changing, but they are far from serious. I think by now you know that I believe we are here to have fun so there's no way I'm not going to be rolling with laughter while trying to choose on thing I might do out of fear.
How rude ... by the time Greggie and my mother where done with me they had a list as long as my arm. It's a serious toss up between checking my stats obsessively, going to sleep before midnight, getting back into meditation and finding time to read. That's why I'm sharing it with you, because you are wondering how things like this can be laced with feelings of fear ... well they do, but that's for next weeks Tuesday night. Right now I just have to be conscious of one of them while trying not to go to gym obsessively seeing that that was pointed out to me too.
I decided to begin last night after Greggie left and what do you know ... I checked my stats about twice, climbed into bed too close to midnight to say I would be asleep by then, decided it was too late to meditate or read ... and promised myself that I'd try again tomorrow! Guess what ... it's tomorrow!