It's nearly the end of day 145 and I've managed to stall blogging as long as I can. Truth be told, it's the first time since the beginning 'project me' that I haven't had an ounce of inclination to blog.
Seriously, I just don't wanna talk about it.
Committing to blogging daily is one thing, but committing to living consciously and having fun no matter the situation, truth or realisation is another. I think it's been a good run of happy days and I just need a moment to pull myself off to the corner and have a quiet word with myself.
I haven't been able to go to gym in a few days and I can't believe how I miss it. But I don't wanna talk about that ...
My body is all pms confused thanks and nothing is?in-sync?... but I definatley have all the grouch, moody, weepy symptoms ... that I don't want to talk about.
I certainly don't want to talk about how angry I am at myself for going back to Mr Big when I knew full well that ... oh, I just don't wanna talk about it. News flash ... he's met someone (and I'm happy for him) ... but he did throw in her swimmer's body! My fault for knowing full well that if he had issues with my physical body in the first place, it would never go away! Lesson learned ... the only person who did any disrespecting was myself. So I'm trying hard not to beat myself up and wound myself ... but still don't wanna talk about it!
Did I mention that Genuine and I are getting on so well and talking for hours on the phone. I even laughed so much that I grunted ... and didn't care! That was after I had finished crying over my foolishness with Mr Big ... of course.
It's time to meet Genuine ... and now Mr Big has dragged up all the body issues ... on the week that I can't go to gym while the tattoo heals ... but hey, I really don't feel like talking about it!