I'm tough! I'm tough! I'm tough! I'm ... sick! Flu!! Exhausted!!
I think the shock has let in! Not surprising at all ... because that's what happens to humans!
I forget that sometimes ... I'm only human.
I'm so used to being tough and priding myself in handling it, surviving it, dealing with it, overcoming it ...
Thanks to my new, special and faraway friend @CameronInSD, who I can't wait to Skype with every Monday, this song was shared with me at the most perfect time.
After the car accident I went into my usual space of "I'm fine ... I'm always fine!", but bodies do what they must and emotions do what they need to whether we fight it or not, so by the end of Sunday afternoon, I was riddled with flu.
Monday comes and I do my usual, "I'm fine ... riddled with flu, but still fine, because I'm always fine!"
My Project Me journey has been an incredible one and I pride myself in coming so far and being so tough, but today, after chatting to Cam and having to take sneeze breaks, I have let this song play over and over and over in my head, because there's another lesson that I have to get.
There's the part about not always being so tough, about being vulnerable and about falling apart a little. There's the Project Me part that scares the living daylights out of me ... the part where I may need help, a shoulder to cry on, the answers found for me, a cup of tea brought for me.
There's that part ... the human part!
The part where I can crash and break down and I will still be the Me that I have worked so hard to be ...
These words might have been written for someone else, but when I listen to it, it's written for me ... from me!!!
I can hold my breath
I can bite my tongue
I can stay away for days
If that's what you want
Be your number one
I can fake a smile
I can force a laugh
I can dance and play the part
If that's what you ask
Give you all I am
I can do it
I can do it
I can do it
But I'm only human
And I bleed when I fall down
I'm only human
And I crash and I break down
Your words in my head, knives in my heart
You build me up and then I fall apart
'Cause I'm only human
I can turn it on
Be a good machine
I can hold the weight of worlds
If that's what you need
Be your everything
I can do it
I can do it
I'll get through it
But I'm only human
And I bleed when I fall down
I'm only human
And I crash and I break down
Your words in my head, knives in my heart
You build me up and then I fall apart
'Cause I'm only human
I'm only human
I'm only human
Just a little human
I can take so much
'Til I've had enough
'Cause I'm only human
And I bleed when I fall down
I'm only human
And I crash and I break down
Your words in my head, knives in my heart
You build me up and then I fall apart
'Cause I'm only human
Vulnerability is strength! Takes the most courage. 🙂
Argh--I don't think my last comment went through 🙁
I think we act real tough and convince ourselves that we are capable of handling a lot more than we can. Sometimes our bodies need to remind us to slow down.
I'm bummed I can't see this video--I love Christina Perri's voice. Will have to YouTube for later. Hope you feel better soon, Jodene! XOXO
Beautiful! Honour yourself authentically, how wonderful! Warm hugs 🙂