It's yet another full moon.
To me that's not just any night. For a handful of year's I've taken time to pause and reflect on the full and the new moon cycles and truly have a look at what I've done or want to do before the cycle returns again.
I stopped doing that when I was in a relationship. I still haven't begun to figure out why, but I stopped. It was pretty soon after the break up that it was new moon and on that night I reignited my love for my rituals and how healthy and reflective these nights are for me.
I waited to blog so that the sun had moved on and let the rays of the moon flow over me as I shared yet another cycle ... the first in the new year. In a little while I will run a bath, light lots of candle, burn incense and think about the fullness of who I am. The fullness of how far I have come and how strong I have truly realised I am. On the other hand, I also have to look at where I want to be when the full moon comes around again and every time I think of it, I think of the moments that I let myself go.
I think about the days that I get so angry and want to stomp my feet and demand answers from my past. Then there are the times I get sad and think that I feel lonely. Then there's the days of falling off the healthy wagon and comfort eating ... maybe not for as long as I used to do, but calorie overkill happens none the less.
I always think to myself ... oh, you have just let yourself go.
And then I turn to a song about truly letting oneself ?go ... and I play it, over and over again.
It always gets me up, calling friends, making plans and doing something on my vision board ... even if it's as small as buying something I've wanted for a while and making every excuse or cutting my hair, or wearing red lipstick.
So tonight, I will reflect on how I have let myself go and need to focus back onto myself the way that #projectme holds me steady. I know that I'll visualise where I want to be when the full moon comes around ... and I will have wanted to let myself go in very different ways.
George Strait sings it best ...
He wondered how she'd take it when he said goodbye.
Thought she might do some cryin': lose some sleep at night.
But he had no idea, when he hit the road,
That without him in her life, she'd let herself go.
Let herself go on a singles cruise,
To Vegas once, then to Honolulu.
Let herself go to New York City:
A week at the Spa; came back knocked-out pretty.
When he said he didn't love her no more,
She let herself go.
She poured her heart an' soul into their three-bedroom ranch.
Spent her days raisin' babies, ironin' his pants.
Came home one day from the grocery store and found his note,
And without him there to stop her, she let herself go.
Let herself go on her first blind-date:
Had the time of her life with some friends at the lake.
Let herself go, buy a brand new car,
Drove down to the beach he always said was too far.
Sand sure felt good between her toes:
She let herself go on a singles cruise,
To Vegas once, then to Honolulu.
Let herself go to New York City:
A week at the Spa; came back knocked-out pretty.
When he said he didn't love her no more,
She let herself go.
To Vegas once: Honolulu, New York City.
Came back knocked-out pretty.
I might not be able to jump on a plane and head to New York City, but I have exciting plans, bigger dreams and a new shade of red lipstick that I just can't wait to wear out on the town.
