Sportsy is about to arrive at Greggie's for yet another game of the 2010 world cup soccer (yes, I say it that way for googley purposes) and the whole day I've had one little thought tingling the back of my mind ... dinner!
I adore cooking and always use the freshest?ingredient. Not to boast, but dinner consists of Buttered brown rice with roasted slithered almonds, steamed green vegetables and spinach that will both be tossed with a hint of garlic and black pepper and chicken. Not just any chicken, but chicken that has been marinating in crushed pepper, lemon, garlic and finely chopped?Italian?parsley, chives and wild rocket. For dessert there will be fresh?strawberries?in balsamic?vinegar?and black pepper which will be drizzled with lightly whipped cream.
What's the occassion? Love of course. Love for my friends and for my passion to cook and for the soccer of course. Greggie isn't the biggest soccer fan, but here sure is a fan of a great meal ... and so I cook.
A lot of my energy has been spent on my body issues of late and I've slowly noticed that I have less of a leg to stand on about anyone outside of me having an issue with my body and I have finally realised that the journey is totally personal. Yes, it's one thing to say it, but it's a totally different thing to finally get it. Getting it does something very incredible ... well it did something incredible. It gave me permission to choose whatever I wanted and after a whole lot of confusion, frustration and watching myself blindly eat, I realise something magical. I don't have a relationship with food.
It's not that I have a bad relationship with food, but I don't have a relationship at all. Well, that's not entirely true because food and I coexist so there has to be some relating ... so what's missing?
The key to 'project me' of course ... consciousness!
I don't have a conscious relationship with food. I couldn't tell you how to listen to my body and feed it what it truly needs in order to feel great without losing the fun and passion for food.
My history with unhealthy relating to food and my body stems back to my earliest childhood, but all of that is only deflection and blame. I'm 36, I'm beautiful, I'm sexy ... I'm just not treating my body with the love and respect that I treat other's bodies.
I adore cooking for other's! I use the freshest of ingredients ... I could go on and on ... but I have a beautiful relationship with my friends and loved ones through food and a sad with with myself.
What a gorgeous realisation. It's about losing weight for unusual family reasons that I have finally realised as a cause for the weight obsession. But losing weight has not been an issue for a while or at least ... it hasn't been the goal! Happiness is the goal and being happy for me means being conscious!!
So ... I'm about to start a brand new relationship ... with food!
It starts tonight and even though I'm cooking for two of the most special people ... for the first time I'm cooking for me!