I've become an incomplete sleeper. Most nights I lie awake, aimlessly. Other nights I distract myself with desperate thoughts and in the most desperate state, with social media or fantasies of my full and complete future life.
Although I have walked a very deep, spiritual life for many years, there is something that has left me feeling lost over the past few months, to a point of feeling it's time to retract myself from the life vision I have had since I was about 6 years old. That connection between my youthful thoughts and my desire to fulfill my life purpose over the span of my adult life also came to me in sleepless hours.
Yet, something has shifted over a handful of nights. I'm sleeping through and instead of waking up exhausted and apathetic at 6:30am, I'm focused and doing my morning ritual by 5:30am. So, what's changed?
I've returned to FAITH!
Like so many people I have known in my life: The recovering alcoholic, the desperate man determined to reclaim the woman he's let go of, the survivor or cancer, the financially destroyed, the drug addict and the lost soul.
Unlike most of them though, I have no desire to return to religion. Deeper than that, I have found my spiritual path and although it's a road filled with obstacles, uncertainty at many crossroads and unexpected detours, I am certain that it's the right path for me and returning to a religious sect or way of thinking is impossible as a life choice or concept I can imagine living in.
Unconsciously and sometimes with many hours of conscious pondering, I have felt a panic wash over me that the majority of people who have made brave changes or had life altering moments, have reconnected with religion to restore their faith. I've felt myself well up with fear that I may never master the art of living this Project Me journey I have been on for over a decade, because the key has seemed to be one I'm not prepared to turn.
I'm a great listener to the inner voices and I shamelessly share the messages with many people I know. In the 5 years I have been blogging, every realisation I have had, has stemmed from those inner voices. In the pages to follow, I will share my belief in where my voices come from and what I believe we are supposed to do with them.
These inner voices have guided me to the deeply conscious and fruitful life I have become known for living. Many people have patiently waited, while I figured out how to turn my Project Me journey into a book of tools or set of steps that they too can follow. One of the reasons why my nights have been so sleepless is because I've been unable to find the time, inspiration or starting point of how I have gotten to where I have since I started walking the conscious steps of Project Me.
I have years of blogs as a source of information and I have dozens of starting points, with workshop content and randomly saved epiphanies, ?yet this book has been like a massive bolder in my path, that I have neither been able to get around or move.
One of the biggest forces of my stuckness has been my self sabotage, which every addicts, loners and destroyers of personal dreams can relate to. My frustration has turned to anger, because I have the tools, consume myself in consciousness and should we wiser than to fall back into old patterns and destructive ways. Millions of us can say this, yet it seems the ones who have the greatest turn around the ones who reignite their faith.
It took me dozens of sleepless nights to finally allow the message to sink in, but when I heard it, I reveled in my realisation that the one thing I have never let go of is FAITH. Although religion and me parted when I was in my early teens, I reframed my beliefs into a spiritual path, that has been my guide and light with every step I have taken.
As early as 2001, I was playing around with developing self help steps, just like the world wanted. By 2007 I had developed the first workshop of the 5 vital steps we need, to change anything in our lives, which is now the foundation to the Lifeology products & services I offer, alongside my business partner.
Over the past year I have become frustrated, yet in all the twists and turns I have taken, I have never shifted my fundamental beliefs, have always believed in Greater Powers, have ritual & gratitude, but mostly, without never knowing how fundamental it would become in my Project Me teachings, and by just having to read through a few blog posts in my 5 years of public journaling, it's become fundamentally clear that, I have always walked in my own footsteps faith.
The world has become over consumed with the steps of self help, empowerment and what I like to call, The Happiness Movement. Nearly every blog post or article shared is titled, "The 10 steps to happiness" or "How to become a success in 7 easy steps" or "The 5 things that every financially successful person has in common".
We have become desperate seekers of these steps, just like we have become desperate to find the belief system that will help us find this Happy Place that it seems we are destined to live.
In this book, I will share my rediscovery of FAITH, without having to return to religion, which has been one of the single most profound realisations I have had and has finally helped me see the bolder in my path as less of an obstacle and more of a vantage point.
I will give you steps, to calm the ego and appease the rational mind. In fact, I will give you 5 steps and share my stories of the moments I released the power of each one and the journey that step has lead me along.
But first, as yourself the same question I asked of myself, after realising I wasn't so lost after all:
What if the only the self help steps you need are to walk in the F.A.I.T.H you have in yourself?
F - Focus
A - Acceptance
I - Intuition
T - Trust
H - Happiness
PS ... I have just written, and you have read, the introduction to the NEW book, Project Me - Rediscovering Faith