What is the point of being my own boss if I don't understand the concept of working in my own time, setting my own benchmarks and clocking out when I'm ready? Even when I was at my most immobile with my back, I hardly ever clocked out. That might have meant my head ticking over with ideas, but it was still work, work, work.
Yesterday was an experience for me. I woke up jealous that kitty would get to lie around all day. Got dressed into my gym clothes at 7, dragged myself through my daily blog post and then managed to stall getting to gym until just after 10. The whole time I was promising myself that I would work as soon as I got home. I would work until the moment I had to go to dinner with friends and I would work when I got back from dinner. That would make up for any wasted time.
This coming from a recovered (okay, recovering) workaholic is never a good sign. I work my little behind off and one day of total apathy is not going to spin me into a downward spiral of failure.
I did it ... I actually did it ... I had a nothing day!
It's amazing to learn the 'project me' less that when you give yourself a gift of doing something different you are showered with other gifts.
One was getting to spend time with Greggie and my dearest Twinkletoes where I can be me and I didn't have to explain me need for nothingness. It was my day to escape and upon Greggie's suggestion we ended up watching the one movie that shows me how far I have come in my life.
When all else fails ... watch Superstar!!!
I could see a smudge of horror spread across Twinkletoes' face at some scenes that could be deemed totally off the wall,?inappropriate?or?ridiculously goofy. The very times when I was howling with laughter most of all.??I have seen this movie way more than a dozen times since I first saw it when I was as nerdy as Mary Katherine herself and so I can imagine someone watching it for the first time and wondering why I love it so much. Granted, I didn't snog trees but I was dreaming of a first real kiss at that time.
I was a very late bloomer in the kissing,?fondling?and sexing department. I was also hiding a very quirky personality at that stage and was envious that Mary Katherine had the courage to speak to trees, candles and her very hip version of God. Actually, I did speak to trees, candles and my very cool version of God, but it wasn't shamelessly.
One of the greatest gifts the movie gave me was the ability to form my own relationship with whomever existed in my Universe. To have my own version of God, Goddess and whatever I chose. Yesterday I sat there and questioned if any part of it were offensive?
When I was growing up as a Jewish girl, my best friend at the time was Catholic. I went to mass, could say the rosary and knew which saint to call on for what miracle. I was equally dedicate to Hebrew and Shul at another stage of my life, but my relationship with my God was not that formal. I needed to make friends with the Universe and everyone in it.
I feel like I'm explaining myself, but that's because Twinkletoes really did gasp in horror at some points and because I am forming a bond with someone who is very Catholic. Maybe I'm nervous about the domino effect of my truth?
Either way, I indulged every moment of a movie that reminds me of who I was and what I have become. In my own right I do dream of being a Superstar. In my own way I am that off the wall and quirky and in my very own way I do have my own relationship with the Gods.
On all three, I don't flinch!
On all three, I take pride in who I am!
I got totally plastered last night. Yep, the drunk kind. Something else I hardly ever do. I'm a little reputation obsessed at times and drunk giggles and snorting laughs is not a side I like to show often. This morning I feel the need to call everyone and tell them I don't do that often but that would be super silly! This morning I also feel like absolute poop ... that's just a FYI!
Anyway, I feel as though I'm rambling but the point of the profound 'project me' message is that we all have it in us to dream the impossible dream and become our own Superstar, have the perfect kiss and form our own relationship with the God (and in my case Goddess) that we choose.
PS ... for those of you who haven't ever seen it ... here's the totally off the wall trailer and hats off to Molly Shannon of Saturday Night Live for creating this amazing character and sharing such an incredible message in the most inappropriate way 😉
PPS ... next time you can choose the movie, Twinkletoes.
This is all part of that Superstar personality of yours! 😉
Well done for turning the day into something so positively special when it could have, quite possibly, turned out otherwise. Even if it did mean there are some morning after affects. 😀
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... and it took me an entire day to recover 😉 Hence the response and whole day late!!
You're quite right that the movie is a bit off the wall, however - we are allowed to escape into a world where we can be our own little Superstar and not fear the judgment or ridicule of other people living a Stepford Wives existence. Who am I to say that the movie is off the wall when you have lived Marie Katherine's life or found meaning in her goofy and silly actions? That would say that I think you're off the wall, and you're not. The movie was light hearted fun and in a time when we are all going through our own little difficulties, it brought light and lifted the spirits so I'm actually quite flattered that you and Greg would share this movie with me.
I can remember how much I wanted a first kiss and when it eventually came, I was horrified. So I can understand the journey that Marie Katherine had to go through to see that the anticipation and the pedestal we put some people on in the end turns into "oh that was okay". If I knew better and was able to face my truth back then I would have saved that special moment for the right person and I bet I would have had a great memory and a beautiful story to tell.
So whether or not you kiss trees, talk to candles or sometimes live with dreams in a fantasy world - these are the experiences that make us human and something we can all laugh about or share a cup of tea over in our golden age.
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As always, your comment is so moving and reminds me just how blessed I am to have the bond that I do with you. You have become such an incredibly solid part of my life and I can't wait to travel this journey of friendship!! I love you more than French toast drizzled with maple syrup and a hot pot of tea!
I hate to admit, I've never seen this movie but have always wanted to...it's now on my Netflix ;).
I'm so happy that you allowed yourself to have a day off and to have so much fun...even though you're paying for it now :p. You must always make time for fun!!
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You will absolutely love it!!