I don't have much willpower and have to confess that I was taking diet pills for the greater part of 2014 and into last year. No one knows that, because I was riddled with shame. When life go stressful, I turned to a homeopath for help, because it's part of my belief system that we have the ability to deal with certain parts of our health and life without modern medicine. Why I believe it's only a part of our lives and that modern medicine is vital to us, is another blog all together. The point of the story is that I confessed to the homeopath that I was taking prescription diet pills and I was desperate to get off them.
I'm a pretty healthy eater and have come from a place of being a size 46 to hovering between a 40 & 42 for well over ten years. I have managed to keep the majority of it off, but have always carried weight. Linked to my belief system (best described as pagan) I have always believed in avoiding anything foods which are too processed and trying to eat as natural as possible. The problem is, far too many people give their opinion and fad diets constantly sent me on a spin of confusion as to the best and worst things to feed my body.
Surprisingly, the homeopath sent me to an old school dietician, who took one look at what I was eating and told me the nuts, oats, full cream products and fruit had to go. Fat makes fat, was her comment to me and she went on to introduce cereal, fat free products and loads of sweet chilli sauce and cottage cheese into my diet. I was also put onto a protein shake, because I needed something to keep me full.
I wasn't full and I wasn't enjoying the vast change in my diet. I couldn't believe I was allowed rice krispies, but I couldn't have yoghurt and almonds. I questioned her a few times and needed a lot of convincing that the amount of processed food was actually good for me. I missed my old way of eating, but because I have always carried weight, I didn't trust myself to begin to know what is good for me and not.
However, I'm a morning person and haven't missed a sunrise in years. After a few months of eating the way the dietician set out, I was tired and I was getting myself down about nearly everything in life. I went back to chat to her again and, granted, there was a lot going on in my life, she told me to add more sweet chilli sauce to my meals.
Something wasn't sitting right and I also wasn't losing weight. I was starving, force feeding myself at free foods and missing sunrises. I went to her one last time and at this point I do have to say, I adore her. I felt supported and could see she truly wanted the best for me. She also absolutely believes in her way of eating, but it just wasn't working for me.
I couldn't go round in circles again, so I started where most of us do ... Google! I purely wanted to compare fat free with high fat diets and see which had more credibility. What I found was a Youtube video, documentary about sugar, called That Sugar Film. I watched with my full attention and then spent the next few hours literally horrified at what I was learning about all the hidden sugars in the food we eat. Then I unpacked my entire kitchen onto the counter and started to add up the sugar content in all the fat free products I had been consuming.
As I read the labels, I shoved them into a box and waited for the following day to get it all out of my home. I then watched another few hours of interviews and discovered Sarah Wilson and her book, I quit Sugar and began the daily process of living sugar free.
I've tried it all before, so I committed to only thirty days. I measured myself on the first day and swore I would wait one week before measuring myself again, but I only lasted a few days and I had already lost just over two centimetres around my waist.
The rest of the story has much unfolding to do, so follow me on Snapchat for the real inside into my world, or sign up to keep on journeying with me.