I have an interesting habit. No wait, I have two interesting habits. Firstly, I have the habit of needing to pee at least twice a night and my second habit is using the cellphone as a guiding light in the dark. While I'm there I check out what's happening on Facebook and Twitter despite never commenting just in case someone asks what I'm doing awake at such an odd hours.
I read it on Facebook first. A status from a dear American blogging friend of mine who was singing the praises of the final triumph for America. I scrolled down until before the news broke and read a few innocent posts pre the death announcement. Twitter was abuzz with opinions, breaking news and pride that Twitter had broken the story.
My thoughts were random but the one that stuck out the most is that Google must be pretty bummed that it's not the breaking source of news anymore.
Immediately I thought of Soldier Guy and the number of times I have seen a Facebook status honouring yet another friend he had lost in this fight. I then thought of another blogging friend who's blog is entitled "the tales of an army wife". I then thought of my dad and what he would have said if he were alive. No matter what, I know he would have cried. He would have thought about the moment when the heard that the first plane had hit the twin towers and he would have remembered the fear that struck him knowing his daughter was a few blocks away.
The Jock and I fought today. We fought because I agreed with someone who said that so many lives had been lost to get to this point. I think he didn't agree with my tweet that said "You don't stop a man or his mission by killing him." He told me that he could see I wasn't American by my comments and made me sound pretty damn heartless. Meanwhile I was lying in my bed with a hundred thoughts and responding to tweets of joy that this man had been stopped. I have worked hard to get to the beliefs that I have and all that I am proud of is that they are my own and I will not waiver from them. So when my beliefs are bought to questions my thoughts turn to the person who is questioning them and never to what I am thinking.
At about the time that Osama's body was thrown out to sea, I was thinking that mother earth is unconditional and she wouldn't mind taking him because I don't blame no man wanting to have him. It must have been near that time that I was hoping the world understands that it is up to each one of us to take responsibility for our thoughts in order to never create a man like Osama again.
I watched my mother cry for the Americans today and she said the same thing that The Jock did ... you won't understand unless you are an American. Although I respect that statement I think that half the problems is that we have forgotten that we are all human being first and foremost. I did not have to lose someone in 911 to have lost. I did not have to fear for my life in order to fear and I did not have to be born in American in order to feel from the depths of my heart today.
I live by one rule: Harm to none! I lived it before I even understood it and whatever I do I ask myself if I would like the same done to me in return. Although I will never understand it, I respect that people think death is a punishment of sorts. I think living and suffering is far worse ... but that's a choice I decided to make my belief.
Every day is about 'project me' and that's about living my truth and being conscious of the consequences. I am not here to change opinions or make people think differently. I'm just here to discover my own opinions and live with them. I cried for those who did in 911. I cried for soldiers who lost their lives. I was in Venice when the flags flew half mast for 6 soldiers who died ... and although I did not know them and was only a visitor in their country ... I cried!
I did not cry today!
I did laugh though ... when my eleven year old nephew's status read: "I bet he never thought he would be fish food?" ... kids do say the?darnedest?things!