I can't believe that this all began a year ago. More than that, I can't believe how much I have changed and grown in one year and I can't believe that it has all been documented and my story is out there. Only once have I ever gone back and ready any of the past entries and for some reason I don't think I will do that for a good few years. Don't ask me why, it's just a feeling.
Considering that I live my life goallessly but filled with purpose, I'm not one of those girls who makes new year's resolutions. I do, however, do a little maths and get a better understanding of the year ahead. I don't know if I've ever shared with you that I'm a numerologist? Well, I am and numbers are very important to me, so new years is more about the beginning of a new cycle than the impact it has on my year according to how the numbers change. It's been on my mind a lot over the past few days and so I decided to share it with you.
2010 is a 3 year. Can you see that, you add the 2 and the 1 and?voil? ... 3! That means we are all heading into a 4 year!
But let's chat about 3 first so that I can see what I'm leaving behind. 3 is a very nurturing number as well as one that deals with communication and socialising. It's about people and a hole lot about voice and influence. As far as that goes I had a whopper of a year. I needed a whole lot of nurturing and through that I learned just how much I actually do for myself. It was an interesting way to learn just how strong I am. Do you know that today I remembered that I had back ache at Greggie's birthday party ... that was in MAY. That is how long I have had to focus on nurturing, voicing my needs and seeing who my friends are.
The start of 'project me' is a very 3 energy because of the influence I discovered I have the ability to make. My writing has improved leaps and bounds and so has my social skills. I used to hide behind Greg in the business and tell him I was only good behind the computer. Now I am out there, collecting business and making contacts. Business has been tough, money has been scarce but it has been a year that has solidified my dreams, hopes and aspirations. I have learned so much about my potential and start a new year with a solid foundation.
As for friends, relationships and love ... well I can't begin to express how much I have learned about myself through my relating with other people. I have ended business partnerships and close friendships, walked away from lovers and been walked away from too. At the same time, I have solidified bonds with friends that have helped me understand what it means to be perfectly content amongst certain company. As a matter of fact, today I removed myself from all dating sites because I woke up with the realisatiion that I have a beautiful friendship to work on ... one with me.
This year I discovered that I can be loved and love in return. That I can attract lovers and friends and through all my meetings I understand who I am and what I want from the people I have in my life. But first, I need to take are of me for a bit.
Because this year has been about nurturing, it's not surprising that is was so difficult to care for my body. It's not surprising that I didn't find dating easy and it's expected that my novel wasn't finished.
But what about the year ahead? What about that number 4 that stems from the change of date that is 2011?
4 is an interesting year because it deals with foundation, creation and discipline most of all. It leads well from a three because the nurturing and understanding of self is there to head on into building that dream. On that note, I can't believe that 'project me' has become one of the focal points of Lifeology for next year. What began as a little blog is about to?optimise?a 4. There is the potential for it to grow and with the launch of "project me community" there is hard work, dedication and the need for focus.
On a personal and intimate note, next year is very much about finally focusing on me with discipline and balance. Libra and balance don't go hand in hand ... well, that's not really true because everything is neutral, but I'm not great at sticking to the eating, gyming and self respect.
When it comes to love and relationships, it is ?year of more solid relationships than the wofty men that were around this year. But, that's not my worry just yet. Right now the love I want to focus on next year is the love for myself. I have had to remind myself that I won't die without sex. I'm not a prude but I don't want to be in the space I was ever again. I'm not going celibate but I'm not settling for something that signifies the respect I have built up for myself through 'project me'.
Today I sat with friends and share some truths about how I feel about love, my body and what I want for myself. It was such an empowering thing to hear myself speak and we have promised to help each other in the true 'project me' style of sharing our stories and encouraging each other because we believe in each other.
One more sleep ...